Sincerely Riley B. Riley

I am the rainbow with an arch as high as the sky,

I danced around in bold pastel colors flipping my hair in the misty rain,

I watched Golden Girls, oh how I loved my Red, Blue and Green Pearls

I found them on the side of the world where I hid my darkest secret.

I embraced the words “I Hate You,” they held me so tightly.

Admiring my mom’s tight pin curls, the way her hair covered her black eye just perfectly,

I was carried in the womb of a defenseless woman for nine months of a treacherous journey.

Kill me already, before he kills you.

But again, I was soothed by the words “I Hate You.”

I forcefully learned to walk at the age of nine months

Because his boots were shoes I’d never want to fill.

 But oh how I loved his motivation, “I hate you.”

What great joy I got from these sweet words rolling off the tip of his nicotine smoked lips.

The moment I dreamed of being dead more than alive,

I found a color that nearly saved my life.

This bright yellow color was my communicator.

I learned to speak after two years of watching my mom get beat

Most frequently I used the words, “I hate you.”

I hate you because you killed my mother.

I hate you because you caused so much pain.

I hate you because that was the only woman I knew.

You didn’t give me a chance to love her, to need her, to hold her, or to help her.

Then God granted me sunlight in a purple silhouette, I felt her spirit all around me.

Mom, I hate you. How dare you leave me with a man who does not know me.

I hate you because this rainbow runs through my blood.

The only wish I had was for you to kill me,

But you let him beat you to the punch.

Here I lay with bruises as deep as my love for you,

In an orange casket filled with sunshine and smiles.

I hate you because you killed the man I never wanted to be,

But I’ll live through these colors only being me.

By: Anonymous